“How are the boys?” she asked. “Spunky as ever,” I say. “Excited about Easter.” “Yes, they’re at that perfect age,” was her reply. “I still get excited about Easter,” was my reply. I don’t get snarky about too many things, but it absolutely drives me nuts that Easter is a “kids’ holiday.” What are we allowing our culture to teach us about significance and life when this deeply meaningful, all-age-appropriate celebration becomes merely a reason for kids to get excited about candy and eggs? My neighbors lost their grown…Continue Reading “Why I don’t get excited about chocolate bunnies”
My cheery alarm interrupted my dream for the third time this morning. My room was pitch black and everything was quiet. I felt sweaty and gross. I pulled my body away from my bed, put my glasses on, and made my way to the kitchen. Still dark, still quiet. I need water. And coffee. I wander around looking for a mug as if I’ve never been in this kitchen before. Now what? Oh right. Milk. Pour. the milk. Pour the coffee. I wander some more….Continue Reading “Grace for the Mush”
The Lord had great compassion on me; he saw my heart and knew what I needed. I sat and was quiet before the Lord; he spoke in power and might. He does not ignore those who seek him, those who seek him in honesty and with humility. The proud he cannot reach; his voice cannot be heard above their selfish thoughts. He led me to a quiet place, a spacious and open home. He spoke to me through his Word, he moved my heart through…Continue Reading “A “psalm” for a quiet moment”
I sat across from my good friend over flatbread pizza and a Caesar salad. It had been a half a year since I had seen her. She was busy with finishing up her master’s degree and putting hours in at two different internships. It seemed as if she had done so much changing, so much moving in a positive direction. I was still doing my same thing of raising little royalty. It is a tricky thing for a stay-at-home mom to update a friend on…Continue Reading “My Greatest Work”
It’s raining out. Harder now than it was a half hour ago. Ladies are getting dropped off at the curb of the medical building. I see them from my perch at the wall-sized picture window on the third floor. The doctor told me I was extremely healthy and her easiest patient today. Now, I’m parked by the elevator lobby of the third floor, wanting to hear from the Lord. Black birds travel together in a pack through the rain. Out of view and then back into…Continue Reading “Looking Up in the Rain”
Yesterday I got to share a cup of coffee with a mom of three young ones. She told me about her husband’s crazy work schedule and his upcoming trip overseas. She told me about her mom that cared for her much and her dad that was not around. Then she mentioned, almost without realizing it, that growing up one of six children in a single-mom household had taught her important lessons. She had learned patience, and she had learned that the world did not revolve…Continue Reading “When We Aren’t Enough”
God is stretching me now, I know. A few months ago, I was driving the rental car, and I needed to tell Dave why my heart was so heavy. We had just pulled out of that church’s orderly parking lot, on to a picturesque street lined with beautiful homes and big trees shedding their yellow and orange leaves in the gentle fall wind. Half an hour earlier, I had tears streaming down my cheeks as we talked about our little house. It wasn’t about the house,…Continue Reading “Breaking”
My hands were on the wheel, my SUV pulling out of the church parking lot. It was me, and three boys in my back seat. They were a bit worn from their two-hour rehearsal for the Christmas program. I was playing worst-case scenarios in my head for how we would proceed for the rest of the day. How little sleep did they get at Grandma’s and Grandpa’s last night? How much sugar did they smuggle while there? How will I convince them to nap this…Continue Reading “His Voice”
“I am the eternal God,” He whispered to me. It was a beautiful fall day. I was just coming off of a four-day full-family vacation, drenched in the beauty of the California Sierras and laced with thankfulness and love. My heart was full and at peace. And as I took my first few steps on the wet asphalt path, he reminded me that he stays the same, even as the seasons change. I ran into an angel last night, although I’m sure she would tell…Continue Reading “Eternal”
Something happened. I was hanging out with my group of friends. Our littles were watched by a baby-sitter in one room. Our 6-year-olds were in another room playing together. And then something happened.
The moms started hearing bits and pieces. This boy said one thing. That girl said another thing. We started asking questions, wanting to know what really happened. Was it my son that needs to apologize? What were they playing? Why did it happen?
My son told me his part of the story, but he did it begrudgingly—not wanting to talk about it. Was it because he was a little embarrassed? Was it because he did something he shouldn’t have? Was it because it wasn’t that big of a deal to him?
All kinds of questions ran through my head. I wanted to know what happened. I wanted to know why he didn’t want to talk much about it. I wanted to know what was going on in his head. I wanted to know how best to respond to the situation. I wanted to know now.
Ironic how I had just been studying patience earlier that day, but now patience was the last thing on my mind. As my brain wrestled with the onslaught of questions, I felt God saying, “Wasn’t I just teaching you about patience? Remember the verse?”
“Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick-tempered displays folly.” Proverbs 14:29
Susan Merrill, from The Passionate Mom, describes patience as “the ability to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay.” Was my knee-jerk reaction showing restlessness? yes. Annoyance? perhaps. Was my son in immediate danger? no. Could I pray about this for a while and wait for the proper time for the truth to surface? yes.
So I am praying that the Lord would give me patience. And I will pray for patience and peace for my friends as they walk through the same scenario with their children.
I know that the Lord will give great understanding in his good time, and that is enough to extinguish the fires of restlessness and annoyance within me [for now].